Saturday, March 23, 2019

It's just a step back, not the end of the journey

Yesterday was a rough day, as was to be expected given where I am on my cycle. I was absolutely exhausted, weepy and snappy, and was even pulled aside at work to have a little chat when I got an insy winsy bit overwhelmed during a busy period that I'd normally handle with no issues but yesterday it just felt like I had no clue how to do my job, I just couldn't keep up and a minor inconvenience (...well, fair enough, a rather dangeous inconvenience of someone leaving a cardboard box in the middle of a pathway -- right next to boiling hot vats -- that I nearly tripped on while carrying stock out) just made me snap and lash out. Not really at anyone directly, more at the offensive box (it got a good kicking), but still. I don't typically have such fury warrior moments, usually I just melt down.

I had a good cry during my break (I don't even care if someone sees me crying anymore; co-workers & managers are used to it by now and newbies will have to learn I'm The-One-Who-Weeps and hopefully not get too uncomfortable every time it occurs) after which I was fine, and I kept reminding myself that it's just the phase I'm in, it'll pass, and I don't suddenly absolutely suck at my job -- my body and brain just currently aren't cooperating. Toward the end of the evening I was doing okay again and today I just... I don't know. I feel a bit meh but it's nothing I can't handle; given how bad I've been getting over the past six months every two weeks, this is child's play.

Wednesday, March 20, 2019

Healthy sleeping patterns are overrated, anyway

Over the past couple of days, I've managed to completely mangle my sleeping pattern; I go to bed between eight and ten in the morning and crawl out at around five or six in the afternoon which, given my shift patterns (evenings & overnights), is okay-ish but not ideal for my actual hormonal well-being... nor are my shift patterns in all honesty, heh.

Now, the sensible thing to do here would be to pull a twenty-four-hour run and just not sleep until after my shift tomorrow (a 17-23 one, so it's doable even when a bit tired) but I'm not sure if I can do that without bucketloads of coffee and caffeine, again, is not very good for my hormonal issues. I'll probably still end up doing it since I'm getting on a new cocktail on Friday so I might as well enjoy the last days of my unhealthy life. o/

Tuesday, March 19, 2019

In good spirits (yes, still! ♥)

After a really good overnight shift, I spent most of the early morning setting up stuff to support my blog, gaming, and looking into my NowTV trial, then spent the actual day sleeping (which isn't what I normally would do because I'd feel it's a waste of a day off) and the evening and night just chilling with the Boy, leveling our new WoW characters (my dwarven warlock and his Kul Tiran druid) while making really horrible jokes on Discord. I'm actually quite proud of one of mine even though it made him just clear his throat but otherwise remain silent.
Q: What do you call a fat chicken?
A: A thiccen. :3's funny, okay? At the very least it made a guild mate chuckle and that's good enough for me! All y'all others just have inferior senses of humour, I swear to gods old and new! >:(

Sunday, March 17, 2019

The cycle begins anew

Today is the first day in about (no joke) a year that I can genuinely say I've felt half-way decent, good even at times. Work was busy but it didn't stress me out in the slightest. The sun was out by the time I'd finished at 6:15 so despite it being a bit on the chilly side, I took a leisurely stroll home, snapping photos instead of rushing like I normally do (and realised once I was halfway home that I'd left my charging/data transfer cable at work & it didn't actually even bother me in the slightest although it means I can't use those  photos unless I partake in some maneuvering with cloud storages and yada yada which I won't do... those pictures will just get spat onto my laptop tomorrow, no problem) and I put four hours into reviewing my online training for work. For me, this is a lot of activity for one day, let alone just the first third of a day.

Oh, and before you click that "Read more"? Yeaaaah, it's my first post on the revamped site and all but I'm talking about periods right off the bat so if you don't want to know or you live in 1543 and think periods are icky and wrong, you might want to skip the first two paragraphs after the cut if you don't want to read about it. Unfortunately as someone with major health issues directly related to my cycle, I am prone to talking about said cycle a lot as my life and well-being literally revolves around my body not understanding what to do with something women are  meant to be able to handle just based on the fact that we're born to do this. 🌢